Why I Stopped Feeling Guilty For Taking Breaks As A SAHM

Alessandra | Posted on February 20, 2025 |

Moms are often left feeling guilty for many things, especially taking breaks. In this blog, I’m going to share why I stopped feeling guilty for taking breaks and why it’s ok that you do too!

Feeling guilty is pretty much inevitable when you’re a mom. If you’re anything like I was, taking a break most likely just feels wrong. It’s life the second you sit down, there’s an imaginary alarm going off in your head, reminding you of everything you “should” be doing. The laundry, dishes, meal planning, breaking up another sibling fight, the list goes on and it never seems to end. Oh, and the worst part? The moment you finally do pause, guilt comes rushing in like an uninvited guest.

For the longest time, I struggled with this. Any time I tried to rest, I felt like I was somehow failing. Or if someone caught me sitting down I looked useless. But one day, I realized something had to change, because I was feeling extremely burnt out. I couldn’t keep running on empty and expect to show up as the mom I wanted to be. That’s when I decided I needed to stop feeling guilty for taking breaks. Keep reading to learn why you probably feel guilty about taking breaks too, plus get some tips to help you deal with it!

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Why Do I Feel So Guilty for Taking Breaks?

First off, it’s important to note why you feel this guilt so often, especially when it comes to taking a break. The guilt doesn’t just appear out of nowhere. It’s deeply ingrained in us. Society loves to glorify the “selfless” mom, right? The one who gives 100% to her kids and her home without ever needing a second for herself. That “Super Mom” look is something so many of us idolize almost. We’ve also been conditioned to believe that if we aren’t constantly busy, we’re lazy. And if we aren’t putting our kids first 24/7, we’re down right selfish. And then to top it off, if we do take a break, we must make up for it by being even more productive afterward. Ugh, I’m tired just thinking of this!

So let’s be real for a minute! None of that is actually sustainable. Moms are not machines. Super Mom does not exist. We are human beings with limits and feeling, and we deserve rest just as much as anyone else!

How to Deal with Feeling Guilty When You’re A Mom

At its deepest point, mom guilt thrives on the idea that we aren’t doing “enough.” But here’s the honest truth: if you love your kids and are doing your very best, you are already enough! The key is to shift your mindset and recognize that rest isn’t a luxury, it’s a necessity for you and your family. Because you can’t show up for them if you aren’t at your best.

Here are a few things that helped me deal with feeling guilty as a mom myself

You deserve to not feel guilty, especially for taking breaks! Here are a few things I do that help with the feelings of guilt.

1. Reminding myself that rest makes me a better mom

A burnt out and overwhelmed mom isn’t doing anyone any favors for anyone. This includes myself and my family. When I take time to recharge, I’m more patient, present, and engaged with my kids! That is better for my entire family, so I why should I be feeling guilty about it?

2. Asking myself, ‘Would I want my kids to feel guilty for resting?’

Putting yourself in someone else’s shoes is a great way to reset your mindset. I want my children to grow up knowing that taking care of themselves is important! If I wouldn’t want them to feel guilty for resting then why should I? I’m setting a great example to my son and daughters by showing them that rest, breaks, and time away from them is ok and healthy. Also, my husband doesn’t feel guilty for resting after work, so again, why should I?

3. Reframing breaks as a necessity, not a reward

I use to think to myself, “Once I fold the laundry, then I can watch TV.” But instead of thinking, “I can take a break once everything is done,” I now remind myself that breaks are part of the process. Resting isn’t something I need to earn. It’s an important part of life.

4. Feeling guilty is a choice

I heard someone say a while back that mom guilt is a choice and I can’t forget it! You have the choice to feel guilty or not about taking breaks, or whatever else you feel guilty about. So take that with you as you work on ending that feeling of mom guilt, because at the end of the day, you don’t have to feel guilty. You just think you should.

A Few Tips to Get Over Feeling Guilty As A Mom

If taking breaks still makes you feel uncomfortable, I get it. It does take time to unlearn all these things society has told us a good mom should be. Here are a few small steps you can take to help shift your mindset over time. This won’t happen overnight, it takes work, but I know you can do it!

1. Start small

This isn’t going to be an overnight fix. It will take time and work, so you have to start small. Do this by trying to give yourself permission to sit for five minutes with your coffee in the morning. No multitasking! Just sit and enjoy your coffee with no guilt. It’s just five minutes (for now.)

2. Replace guilt with gratitude

Simple mindset shifts can make a big difference. Instead of thinking “I shouldn’t be sitting down,” try “I’m grateful for this moment to breathe.” It may sound silly, but reframing these thoughts can be helpful, so I encourage you to give it a try!

3. Remind yourself that rest isn’t selfish

Again, tell yourself that resting and taking a break isn’t a bad thing. Your family benefits when you take care of yourself in a variety of ways. Plus, a happier mom creates a happier home and shouldn’t that be the ultimate goal?

4. Plan breaks into your day

If you can’t figure out how to take breaks, it can help to schedule little pauses into your routine. That way they will become a natural part of your day. If you need help with that, grab my free daily schedule template below so you can plan out your day (with breaks added in!)

Final Thoughts

Honestly, it took me a long time to stop feeling guilty for taking breaks. It took me becoming SO burnt out, I was resentful and snappy, and just not myself. Since I have started prioritizing myself and ditching the guilt though, I can truly say I’m a better mom because of it! I show up (most days) with more patience, more joy, and more energy for my kids. Oh and my house doesn’t actually fall apart when I sit down for a few minutes. The best part is, I don’t feel guilty about it anymore! So if you’ve been battling mom guilt every time you rest, let this be your permission slip to stop. It doesn’t always have to be that way. You don’t need to earn rest, you deserve it.

Let me know in the comments if you are going to take action to stop feeling so guilty about taking breaks!

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